Ultimate Axiom

Joined

• started 18 topics
• posted 490 times   see topics posted on
• send a message

Posts by Ultimate Axiom

• 
  16

  Where's Awake! No.3?

  by Ultimate Axiom in

  1. watchtower
  2. beliefs

  it's nearly march and awake!

  no.3 has still not appeared on jw.org.

  has it come out in paper form, or has something gone wrong?

  1. 
  2. 
  3. 
• 

  Ultimate Axiom

  It's nearly March and Awake! No.3 has still not appeared on JW.org. Has it come out in paper form, or has something gone wrong?
  
• 
  23

  Favourite Comedy Quotes

  by LoveUniHateExams in

  1. social
  2. humour

  i wanted to post a serious, profound quote in stillin's thread but my mind went blank and i'm pretty crap with serious quotes anyway, so i put a jokey quote from the red dwarf computer holly: .

  it's better to have loved and lost than to have listened to an album by olivia newton-john.. when a bemused lister asks why, holly replies "because anything's better than listening to an album by olivia newton-john!".

  this got me thinking, what are everyone's favourite comedy quotes?.

  1. 
  2. 
  3. 
• 

  Ultimate Axiom

  Always plan for tomorrow. That way you don't have to do anything today.
• 
  8

  Will the GB ever do this?

  by why144000 in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  hi, not sure if this has been covered.. http://www.abc.net.au/news/2015-11-13/peter-hollingworth-says-sorry-to-victims-child-abuse-brisbane/6939804.

  i don't have much time for peter hollingworth.

  he has always acted like a pompous prick when i have met him or seen him on tv however he humbled himself and made an apology for his actions and the actions of the church.. any bets on if the gb would ever do this?.

  1. 
  2. 
  3. 
• 

  Ultimate Axiom

  I am not aware the WTS has ever apologised for anything - I would be grateful if anyone could correct me here with an example. And the reason is obvious - they never make mistakes. If they did, they couldn’t possibly write the following could they? (Awake Feb 8, 1972 page 4):

  The Wisdom of Admitting a Mistake.

  “Of course, admitting we made a mistake is the right, honest and decent thing to do. But it is more than that. It is also the course of wisdom. … Wisely we are warned: ‘He that is covering over his transgressions will not succeed [with God], but he that is confessing and leaving them will be shown mercy’ - by God and by God’s servants. Admitting to making a mistake is the course of wisdom … Failure to do so is cowardly … When we refuse to admit we have made a mistake … we are either too proud, or dishonest, or too stupid to recognize that we made a mistake …
• 
  36

  A JW experience

  by Saintbertholdt in

  1. jw
  2. experiences

  this is a quick experience i have recently had and i have two questions at the end.. a couple of weeks ago, the dogs were barking at the gate on saturday morning and wouldn't you know it, it was some witnesses.

  there was a father with his lovely wife and their young daughter.

  the father did all the talking as mother and daughter just dutifully smiled and watched.

  1. 
  2. 
  3. 
• 

  Ultimate Axiom

  I had a visit from an elderly couple of Witnesses last week (the first in several years), and all they wanted to do was hand me a leaflet that posed the question, “what do you think of the bible?”, which was followed by three answers that went something like, is it “just a good book”, “a collection of fables”, or “the word of God”.

  I replied that it had lots of fables in it, but it was far from a good book. I said it’s no different to this ISIS lot, demanding we stone to death worshipers of other religions, adulterers, children who disrespect their parents, homosexuals, blasphemers, and a host of other trivial crimes. They looked a bit lost for words, and said something like, “well that’s not what Jesus taught”, to which I said, “No, but it was the Law Jesus lived under when he was on earth, the Law he was supposed to keep and fulfil”. I’m not sure they even knew what I was talking about, and just asked me again if I would like to take their leaflet, to which I said, “No, I’ve already got the book, along with every other book the Watchtower has ever published”. They gave me a funny look and just walked away.

  I don’t know if these people are dumbed down, when I think back to the 1970s when I was active, I knew a lot of fellow Witnesses who didn’t have had a clue, and could barely argue a case for anything. And the last pair of Witnesses who knocked on my door were young and were able to engage in arguing their case, which we did for nearly an hour.
• 
  13

  SEVEN Types Of Women Pastors Should Watch Out For In Ministry!

  by darth frosty in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  i found this to be interesting especially #6. seven types of women pastors should watch out for in ministry!.

  january 19, 2016 26 comments.

  “for the lips of an adulteress drip honey, and smoother than oil is her speech.” (proverbs 4:3).

  1. 
  2. 
  3. 
• 

  Ultimate Axiom

  This all seems rather sexist, but I like the bit about the “truth in advertising” and “full disclosure". If God had done that with humanity, part of it would read something like this, "I will fill you with powerful hormones and then forbid you to act on them. They will start to flood your body a decade or two before you are emotionally and mentally mature enough to handle the consequences of acting on them. The power of those hormones will not diminish even if you have a partner to satisfy their drive. I will make almost everything pleasurable to you, bad for you. I will make your life a misery and blame it all on the devil".
• 
  28

  There are some real beauties posted here!

  by stillin in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  this one is worth repeating.

  it was buried in a thread and u've been thinking about it all day.. a quote from mark twain, one of my all-time heroes.. "it's easier to fool a man than it is to convince him that he has been fooled.".

  isn't that the truth....

  1. 
  2. 
  3. 
• 

  Ultimate Axiom

  The greatest barrier to finding truth is believeing you already know it.
  
• 
  23

  GB members quotes

  by Gorbatchov in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  for a future project i'm searching for remarkable quotes of current and former gb members.. i've two personal, validated quotes:.

  "sprechen sie deutsch?

  " "ah, ein bisschen!

  1. 
  2. 
  3. 
• 

  Ultimate Axiom

  Hi slimboyfat

  I started collecting them a few years ago, but I din't go looking for them, I just picked them up as I went along. The first group came from Rady Watters' Freeminds site (http://www.freeminds.org/) and I believe they are still there somewhere.
  
• 
  23

  GB members quotes

  by Gorbatchov in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  for a future project i'm searching for remarkable quotes of current and former gb members.. i've two personal, validated quotes:.

  "sprechen sie deutsch?

  " "ah, ein bisschen!

  1. 
  2. 
  3. 
• 

  Ultimate Axiom

  For some reason they didn't all appear - here's the rest...

  “If we let the brothers do this, there is no telling how far they will go.” – Henschel. (On the matter of using one’s conscience instead of rules laid down in the Watchtower).
  
  “There’s nothing here on this earth to compare with God’s organization. There’s never been anything, even in Bible times, to compare with what Jehovah has now or what he is doing.” - Barry. (At morning worship).
  
  “I’ve done a better job cleaning toilets than I did presiding at the Governing Body.” - Klein. (New boy introductory talk from the GB).
  
  “Say what you will about sign language, I still like human voices.” -. Sydlik. (At morning worship).
  
  “Frankly, you could have shot a cannon down the corridor and not hit anyone.” - Sydlik. (Discussing the Roanoke and Denver conventions that he attended, in which the hallways were reportedly clear of the usual singles dating scene).
  
  “These Circuit Overseers always end on time – I’m not used to that.” - Sydlik. (Following a Circuit Overseer’s that finished according to the schedule).
  
  “I especially liked your comment about the Society, that it’s an organization on the move. And today being the day the Governing Body meets, I hope they keep that point in mind.” - Sydlik. (At morning worship).
  
  “Now we’ll have Brother Hash-ee-moo-rah say the prayer. Oh, what’s wrong. Oh, I just got kicked by my wife under the table. Let’s have the text comments read first!” - Barber. (At morning worship).
  “So, I think of John 10:16 this morning, where it says, “I have other sheep which are not of this fold” when I see all these brothers walking in late.” - Sydlik. (At morning worship).
  
  “It’s good to know that not everyone who speaks French are fighting against Jehovah.” - Barber. (After a report from a member of the Guadeloupe Branch).
  
  “A lot of people enjoy the convention. They clap and have a wild time. Two weeks later they’ve forgotten all about it.” - Barber. (At morning worship).
  
  “When you receive a direct invitation from Jehovah through his organization, this is the place he wants you to serve [NY Bethel].” - Barr. (At morning worship).
  
  “Going to college or not may be a reflection of your faith, or lack of [it] … If you are currently going to college, why don’t you meditate in prayer on the possibility of dropping out and doing something better?” - Losch. (During a convention talk).
  
  “The Apostle Paul used an accounting term to emphasize this fact, ‘Love does not keep account of the injury’. Well here at Bethel we have a whole department that keeps account of our injuries. It’s called Risk Management.” - Losch. (At morning worship).
  
  “Just a few minutes ago I was telling Brother Barber how bad I feel. He told me that there’s always the resurrection. I would like to thank Brother Barber for his encouraging words.” - Herd. (At morning worship).
  
  “We did not allow the sisters to divorce and remarry with normal brothers. And it took many long years for the GB to make a change. If affected sisters would have prayed more we would have corrected our opinion much quicker.” – Herd. (On the subject of why it took so long for the GB to change its mind and allow women to divorce practicing homosexual husbands).
  
  “‘Jehovah, forgive me of my sins’ … [is] not good enough. She needs to be specific. … She needs to pour her heart out to Jehovah about it. And then Jehovah will help her. He’ll direct her to the elders in the congregation who can read the bible to her.” – Herd. (Giving an example in a talk about being specific in prayers to Jehovah).
  
  “Brother Russell bid Godspeed to the new venture. But did the Day Star magazine have Jehovah’s blessing? Well, have you seen a copy of it lately? I don’t think so.” - Splane. (At morning worship).
  
  “In some countries we find that young ones 10, 11, 12 are not even unbaptized publishers yet. And then we find that young ones 13, 14, 15 years old are not even baptized. And yet their parents have studied with them since infancy. Well it makes us wonder sometimes, is our teaching program really effective?” – Splane. (During a convention talk).
• 
  23

  GB members quotes

  by Gorbatchov in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  for a future project i'm searching for remarkable quotes of current and former gb members.. i've two personal, validated quotes:.

  "sprechen sie deutsch?

  " "ah, ein bisschen!

  1. 
  2. 
  3. 
• 

  Ultimate Axiom

  Most of them are quite old, but just in case you haven't seen them all before...

  “I don’t want you to do anything with it for the next four years except pee” - Knorr. (Giving one of his “new boy” sex talks to some new arrivals, some of whom were women).
  
  “I can replace any of you, with a 25 cent stamp” – Knorr. (Referring to Bethelites in general).
  
  “It’s good to be here on Monday, it happens about once a week.” - Swingle. (At morning worship).
  
  “So thank you Brother Couch for that announcement, it was given with sincerity and all the love in your heart. Yes time and unforeseen occurrences befall us all and especially to those with cars.” - Swingle. (At morning worship).
  
  “If you have a tendency towards ‘apostasy’, get a hobby and keep yourself busy to keep your mind off of it. Stay away from deep Bible study to determine meanings of the scriptures.” - Klein. (At morning worship).
• 
  20

  Inside Scientology and Escaping the Witnesses - Mon 24th channel 5

  by not bitter in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  thats it really.

  uk channel 5 at pm mon 24th.. maybe its already been posted but sounds interesting.

  1. 
  2. 
  3. 
• 

  Ultimate Axiom

  I gave it eight out of ten, which is pretty good for a Channel 5 program. But it kind of amuses me when the professionals on cults speak of the fear factor that keeps people in a cult, and say things like, “Jehovah’s Witnesses threaten their followers, saying that if they leave they will go to hell when Armageddon comes”. It makes me wonder how much they actually know about the cults they deal with.